Viper Says

Alejandro and Dimitri have gone into a long hiding. Its not they were scared of something or saving their assess from total annihilation [its one of the reason but not the primary one.]. The main reason is well as people say, "when u get addicted..u have crystal clear eyes..coz u r doing a lot of pot..". In simple words and for people who speak hinglish and pretend to have understood what i just said..Alejandro got addicted to watching animated characters. Now hold on your wild horses..Alejandro got addicted to watching animated series where weird people wore their underpants over their pants..and some insanely hot indestructible women wore just underpants...voohoo...[that was Alejandro ..he is so eager to come out of hiding]. As far as Dimitri is concerned he was already coping with al's name changing routine..now he had to watch the animated series also. He was disgusted... he left al and started working in the local subway joint. Okay..steven says that i have elaborate...

After the last episode, Alejandro was feeling a lot of pain in his head. Not because of the betrayal by Anya. But he has been watching Anya's MMS continuously without a break for the past 13 days. Dimitri thought it was really serious this time. Well, time for people say. People say that alejandro was so engrossed in this endeavour the he forgot to change his name over and over and over (-13 times) again. So, Dimitri being the ever caring person decided to barge into alejandro's room and rescue him. But even before he has hatched the eggs of his plan, alejandro came outside his room with his head in his hands.("Head in his hands" is a proverb first used by the chinese modafucker who invented the complex game Mah-jong. The story goes like this: Chinese modafucker -CM and his wife - HW. HW: where is ma sarong? [ Did i forget to mention that HW was of nigger descent. His grandpa was a wrapper in CM's grandpa's factory ] CM: [ Did i forget to mention that this guy...

Setting: Steven's Den. Steven is working on his body for the new look for the next episode. Anya is stretching out on the recliner and watching a romantic movie. She and Al have been going out for a few days now. Ofcourse Steven is not aware of the fact -  so Anya thinks. Steven knows everything.  here we go... Jasper comes in and whispers something in Steven's ear Jasper:[whispering]shhoo shiiii shaa alllshaa hshhsissss Steven:[frustrated, Slaps Jasper] Wat shoo shooo shii shii...speak clearly Jasper:[giving steven the LOOK, People say when Jasper gives the LOOK......well nobody cares] Anya and Aleyandro are going out. Steven:[Height of frustration, he is holding a 10pound dumble and throws at Jasper killing him]Faaak... Anya: [crying at the happy ending] Beautiful...oh that's so cute.. Steven: [grabs anya's hair and pulls her down]U faaaking beatch....U betrayed me..... Anya:[gives steven a low blow, but to her surprise steven is unmoved] Steven:Surprised!!! Anya: Wat...

Setting: Aleyandro and Dimitri are sitting on a broken tree trunk called "trunks" besides a river called "riverside". These two have gone through a lot which have tested their patience and friendship and how much shit they can take from each other. [ On the sincere request of Aleyandro we are not going to make him go through the name changing regime in this episode. His name for all further references in this episode is Antonio Bartolini or simply Bartolini. I promise he will return next time in a confused state. ] here we go... Bartolini: [ keeping his hand over Ds hand ] Man we have gone thru a lot... Dimitri: eww...take off ur hand...dont ever do that again...Dont touch me... Bartolini: [ taking his hand away. In the mind of his hand: boy that skin is so soft..hmmm... ]Hey man we are Braadre Paruuush..(subtitles: brothers in arms) BHAMM!!!!!!BOOM!!!Bim!!!! At this critical juncture with all the sound works enters our protagonists's nemesis - STEVEN. he is sur...

Setting: Alejandro and Dimitri in their apartment cooling off the heat from their last adventure - Steven Seige's.  Alejandro:[ Confused as to what to call himself. This time he is thinking of changing his name to Abbassi Fawal. He wants to sound like a person who mean business. ] Dimitri: [ Fed up with name syndrome of Alejandro ] Alejandro/ Abbassi Fawal is still smitten by the Anya charm and is singing a song or trying to sing a song. So come along. [ boy!! i should give up writing stories and think of seriously getting into writing sonnets and hiakus ] here we go... Alejandro: hmm..hmm..hmmm.... [ no hez not doing wat u think hez doing. Hez just clearing his throat. ] Alejandro: hmm...hmm...hmmm...... Dimitri: [ in his mind: There goes the crooner again. Wish i could put a gag in his mouth ] Alejandro:hmmm....ehmmm...ehmmm.... Dimitri: Stop doing that al...for faaak sake stop doing that... Alejandro: [ looks surprised ] You talkin to me ho...the name is Fawal..Abbasssi Fawal......

Prelogue: 1 2 3 4 hu ha....1 2 3 4 hu ha....1 2 3 4 hu ha....tak tak tak tak ta...na na na nah... Dont get tensed for this is not morse code and nor does this require a willing suspension of disbelief to witness the horrors that Dimitri is going through. For this is not Steven's sound synthesizer. Behold the horrors that i am forced to unleash upon you.  This is the tune to which Alejandro is belly dancing. [A moment of insight into the character's character. Alejandro loves belly dancing.] Dimitri is the only one to have witnessed this horror of fat mass of Fats swaying to the tunes of Arabian Music. oooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwww....there the singer is howling.  [Arabs can only howl or moan. These are the only sounds they can make.--Source Alejandro] As i was saying that only Dimitri is seeing this because he is the only one alive and who will survive. People say when Alejandro belly dances dark clouds surround that place and blow it up with their supercharged lighteners. Pe...

Location: the 'thermonuclear trans-semi-ponder-ducer facilty of advanced neo-meta particulation phenomena'..better known as W.H.A.T.E.V.E.R. Time: late..really late Alejandro and Dmitri are standing outside the gates of 'you know what'. a titanium grill runs along the perimeter of of the facility. Apparently, the people inside do not want people on the outside to enter. they could ve used a door for that purpose..but a door is no match for Alejandro and Dmitri..who are trained to destroy. On this occasion, Steven - the evil architect of the local matrix, and the opposer of Subway, has held Master Po captive. The facilty is under 'Steven's Seige' and Alejandro's and dmitri's mission is to rtetrieve it and get master Po to safety. Alejandro : ill ella elle mcpherson Dmitri: ill ull dum heidi klum Alejandro: what do we zoo dmitri Dmitri: we zoo nothing you fool. remember the instructions..they be watchin us. at this moment Dmitri looked at Alejandro, pu...

Setting: Aleyandro: [ again confused by what to call himself. This time he is taking the easy way out. He is going by the name "Nameless" ] He is confused warrior who just recently killed 3 hot assassins.  Dimitri: The wannabe king who wanted to unite the whole of Chink land for simple reason that his twinky likes the pale yellow chinks.  3 haat assassins: Deadly lil miho!!thats what people call them when they see them. But the legend says that nobody has seen them. So they have to be called miho. But anyways they are deadly this also goes by the legend. Their lethality is yet to be seen by naked eyes. They say none live to tell the tortourous stories of they were deprived of the carnal pleasures. Set: A large castle. Its in a bad shape because me and steven are struggling writers and can't afford to have a brand new castle for aleyandro and dimitri to play kingpin. A bunch of wrinkled old chinese are standing next to Dimitri to give him their piece of mind. [ These wrink...

10 30 pm : Aleyandro and dmitri on a ducati blackbird B-12- Aleyandro driving and Dmitri pillion- aleyandro is singing a Rihanna song 'good girl gone bad'.. Dmitri's eyes are glazed..he has just joined the league of transformers (dmitri's transforms to a doormat!). They are heading for 'the subway' where aleyandro has formed powerful allies in his attempt to subjugate the sandwich eating realm of humanity. Aleyandro  (smtimes also known as haani salaam or salaami paan) : "easy for a good girl to go bad..eating lettuce with dim sums is a diet fad" Dmitri : fuck you ho Aleyandro : well you're alredy do-eeng that. would you be a mind a.. getting baaaack a leetle beet..your caaack is alrezy puzzing againzt me arse...bollocks u sodden faggot! (aleyandro recently realised that he is part british, part jordanian, part footlong with extra mayo and double helpings of cheese) Dmitri : man im the ghostface killah..are you ready fer some mean pain. (dmitri was...

My friend Dimitri ( a proud confident, US loving, Global warming hating, Al-gore fetishing, law abiding citizen ) always complains that i dont tell stories. So here we go Dimitri only for you. If anybody has complains then please curse dimitri because he is solely responsible for putting us through this tormenting turmoil. So the characters of the story are  Alejandro( pronounced as aleyandro ): a confused person who is not happy with the name his parents had given him and recently he has aked everyone to call him Hani Slaam. Dimitri: a CIA operative who loves Al-gore. Al-gorically he hates global warming. Wait a minute..i told this before also Anya:  a russian hot beautiful woman. That's the most deadly or lethal variant of woman ever to grace the planet earth. ( in guest appearance ) and few other bunch of loosers you will become familiar with while i walk you through the story. here we go.. Dimitri: Dude i saw al-gore's daughter. She is way to hot. I wonder how al-gore plans...

[ this is a recorded conversation between alejandro and dimitry. I appologise for the sexual content and nature of the chat but i wanted to bring out the truth in its purest form. So that like all the politicians and cricketers and actors around the world these ppl dont say that they were misquoted. ] alejandro(a): paape..tunak tunak tun dimitry(d): ki karda a: kuch nahin..tu ki karda d: kuch vi nahin...bore hunda a: chenga. d: aaja...hath far mera a: main ni karda d: kaake..na na kar.. a: paape..baabe kehnde ne ki kisse da hath ni farna chahida d: oye..keda baaba kainda...ghabra na...le hath far mera a: na...paape..main ni karda... d: ki main ni karda. ik aa baabeya ne bara siyapa paya ee.. a: paape...baabe kainde ne...ainwe hi...ki balwant singh da hath na faro d: na main tenu balwant kure lagda..?le hath far a: main ni karda d: ja fer...fer na kahi dasya ni.. a: chenga.. d: chal tata...hun ta hath mila la... a: main ni karda.... [will be back wid more of their sexual adventures]